"Please notice that we at IMBY have temporarily disabled our Google AdSense program in order to maintain some air of respectful dignity whilst bringing you this important news from 1504 8th Avenue. Due to the solemn nature of today's post, all references to the words "crack" , "crack whore", and "on the pipe", will be omitted"
Posted on the front door of the building this 12th day of September, 2006.
We are advising all our good and gentle readers to please adjust their definitions of "Imminently Perilous to Life" as of today, 12:01 Eastern Standard Time.
NEWSFLASH: 9/15/06 Someone tore the signs down yesterday. Lord of the Land, Arnold Rosenshein, could not be reached for comment as he forgot to include his phone number at the bottom of the notice.
Any readers out there who would like to volunteer to drop this postcard off at the post office on your way home tonight? Please Email me so we can make arrangements for you to pick it up. Oh yeah, I'll be needing a stamp. What's the postage now for postcards? It's urgent we find out what happened right away!